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The Colbert Report: Misc



Up to date as of February 02, 2010

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June 19, 2008

The Colbert Report is a spin-off of Comedy Central's The Daily Show hosted by Stephen Colbert. The show is a satirical spin on the conservative political punditry found on many 24-hour news channels such as The O'Reilly Factor.



  • June 19, 2008 - Reporting that fruit has dethroned cookies as childrens' favorite snack food, Colbert blames Cookie Monster's abandonment of cookies and newfound love of fruit. After a montage of clips from Sesame Street as evidence to support the claim, Cookie Monster himself appears to explain to Colbert that he has not abandoned cookies, but rather learned to eat them as part of a balanced diet. Although he had many cookie-related episodes in the '70s and '80s ("Me like the Robert Downey, Jr. of cookies"), he explains that he always ate other food as well ("Me not picky"). Colbert argues that this showed he was against cookies and that he should wear a cookie lapel pin (a reference to Barack Obama's refusal to wear an American flag lapel pin). Cookie Monster explains that "you no have to do that" and that Colbert is a "terrible role model." Cookie Monster ends the show by eating Colbert's Peabody Award.
This clip has been released as a bonus feature on several Comedy Central DVDs, including South Park's The Cult of Cartman,[1] Lewis Black's The Root of All Evil collection,[2] and Mind of Mencia: Season 4 - Uncensored.[3]

Muppet Mentions

Picture Episode Description
March 31, 2006 In the last day of Women's History Month, Stephen introduces a segment which was to have paid tribute to women all over the world. The video opening features images of strong women in history, including a prominent spot for Miss Piggy.
April 18, 2006 Stephen presents his regular "Threat Down" where he lists the top 5 threats to America. The number one threat (as usual) is bears, mainly Winnie the Pooh. Stephen urges parents to keep their kids away from "this bear-friendly propaganda masked as entertainment." He continues his rant telling parents to "go into your children's room and remove anything with Fozzie Bear, the Berenstain Bears, Sugar Bear, Yogi and Boo-Boo, the Care Bears, the Snuggle Bear and, of course, Huggy Bear." A picture accomponies each name.
April 26, 2006 While discussing his feelings on the national anthem being sung in Spanish, Stephen shares the day's installment of "The Word," which in this case is "English." Stephen says that the pro-Spanish agenda is even targeting our children. A clip from Plaza Sesamo is played, after which Stephen states "It's called Plaza Sesamo. And I, for one, don't want to know how to get there."
June 19, 2006 The Daily Show concludes with a brief check-in with Colbert at The Colbert Report. Colbert's show description paid homage to The Muppet Show, including a video clip of Sam the Eagle from episode 104.
Stewart: Welcome back to the program. Before we go we're going to check in with our good friend Stephen Colbert at The Colbert Report. Stephen?
Colbert: Thanks Jon. Up next on a very special episode: space travel, sure it's possible, but for pigs? An update on Scandinavian cuisine with our in-house chef, and then our very special guest star Harry Belafonte will lead Fozzie and the gang in a chaotic, and hilarious, version of the "Banana Boat Song"...Day-O! It's so good even Statler and Waldorf will allow themselves to smile. All that plus a final off-key trumpet note from Gonzo. Jon?
Stewart: Stephen, it sounds like you have a dubious collection of guests there.
Sam Eagle: (clip from The Muppet Show) With a few exceptions, the characters on this program are weird and peculiar and not to be trusted.
Stewart: That's our show, join us tomorrow at 11. Here it is, your moment of Zen.
November 9, 2006 In the episode's teaser, Stephen signals the opening title sequence with "Sorry Cookie Monster, C is for Colbert. This is the Eponymous Report!"
November 11, 2006 In the opening of the episode, Stephen announces his interview with PBS' Jim Lehrer stating "the interview will be brought to you by Archer Daniels Midland, the letter R and viewers like you" (referring to the letter/number sponsors on Sesame Street and the underwriters who fund PBS programming).
January 27, 2007 The Daily Show concludes with a brief check-in with Colbert at The Colbert Report. Jon attempts to embarrass Colbert by showing a clip of Stephen as the letter Z in All Star Alphabet.
Colbert: Schumer is our guest next week. Smart move, Chuckie, saving the best for last.
Stewart: Yes, yes, you do occasionally go last. Am I right, my friend?
Colbert: What do you mean?
Stewart: Well, I was browsing the kids aisle at the video store last week
(clip from All Star Alphabet is shown)
Stewart: You know, Stephen, when I watched that I really believed you were alphabetically last.
Colbert: Yeah, you know what Z stands for, Jon - Zrevenge! I will have my zvengeance!
April 19, 2007 Colbert and guest Sean Penn partake in a "Meta-Free-Phor-All" mock game show in response to Penn's criticism of George W. Bush. In between each question, a computer seemingly randomizes the next topic as displayed on a projection screen with images shuffled by in roulette style. One of these images is Cookie Monster, remaining on screen for only a second.
April 25, 2007 During the installment of "The Four Horsemen of the A-pop-calypse," Colbert attacks Albert Einstein and his theory of relativity stating that "'C' does not stand for the speed of light. 'C' is for cookie, and that's good enough for me. If you have a problem with it, take it up with Professor Monster," followed by a clip of Cookie Monster singing "C is for Cookie.".
July 17, 2007 The episode begins with Colbert's teaser of material to come later in the show. Segment subtitles shown on-screen often involve wordplay. For the forthcoming interview with ant expert Mark Moffet, the subtitle reads "The Great Moffett Caper."
July 31, 2007 Colbert continues his coverage of Hollywood's "wrist violence" in addendum to his own wrist injury the previous week. Included in a montage of clips are scenes from Harry Potter and The Empire Strikes Back amongst others which feature some form of wrist injury. After Colbert emerges from his hiding position, he urges viewers to write Congress about this travesty, iff not for themselves, then at least for the children. A scene from The Muppets Take Manhattan follows, with the doctor twisting Kermit's wrist around to test for signs of amnesia. Colbert remarks, "Stay strong, Kermie."
August 16, 2007 Colbert announces himself as the winner of the 2007 Iowa Straw Poll, but concedes that Mitt Romney was actually the "numerical winner." A Sesame Street segment with Guy Smiley appears to represent Romney
January 16, 2008 Guy Smiley footage is again used, this time to illustrate Mitt Romney's victory during the Michigan Republican primary. On this occasion, a clip from a Beat the Time segment with Grover is used as Stephen states that "time is running out for the Romney campaign."
January 17, 2008 Colbert closes the show saying "Goodnight, Mr. Snuffleupagus."
January 28, 2008 Guy Smiley footage appears yet again when Colbert assumes that Mormon Thomas Monson could have "killed" Gordon B. Hinkley (due to lack of a cause of death) in order to control Mitt Romney. Colbert then claims that it would be "so easy to see Monson turn Romney into his puppet."
February 11, 2008 For perhaps the last time, Guy Smiley is seen at the end of a montage celebrating Mitt Romney's campaign for President of the United States, following news that the former Massachusetts Governor would be suspending his campaign.
February 26, 2008 Coverage of the Academy Awards opens with an "Oscars That Are Destroying America" graphic depicting other famous Oscars, including Oscar de la Hoya, Oscar de la Renta, and Oscar de la Grouch.
March 17, 2008 Samantha Power appears as a guest for her first interview since she was dismissed from Barack Obama's presidential election campaign for calling Hillary Clinton a monster. Colbert asked her to clarify what kind of monster she meant, and suggested that there's a way to make it positive: "What about a good monster, like Cookie Monster? [laughter and applause] And her campaign slogan -- I'm helping you out here! -- the campaign slogan could be 'C is for Clinton: that's good enough for me'."
March 31, 2008 Introducing architect Michael Reynolds: "My guest tonight builds houses out of garbage. Big deal, Oscar the Grouch has been doing that for years."
April 29, 2008 John McCain's superstitions are discussed in an article published by the Washington Times, leading to a list of some lucky items the U.S. Senator carries around with him, including a feather. According to the article, during McCain's run for the presidency in 2000, he once misplaced his feather which resulted in a panic until his wife discovered the item in one of his suits. Colbert suggests that McCain only told her it was indeed his lucky feather to cover up for having been seeing another tall blonde. A picture of Big Bird is displayed alongside Cindy McCain.
May 28, 2008 Colbert opens saying, "Tonight's show was brought to you by the number 1 and the letter me."
June 16, 2008 In memory of Tim Russert, footage is shown of Colbert's 2007 Meet the Press appearance in which Russert commented on the fact that Colbert changed his name's pronounciation from "Khol-bert" to "Khol-bear." Holding up a Bert doll, Russert comments, "On Sesame Street, there are two characters, Ernie and..." Colbert responds, "Bert." Russert asks, "B-E-R-T. So why aren't you Col-bert?" Looking at this footage, Colbert comments, "This supposedly objective interview show was clearly brought to you by the letter T."
July 29, 2008 Colbert covers New York's 14th Congressional District in his recurring "Better Know A District" series. Colbert comments, "The district extends across the East River into Queens, home of Kaufman Astoria Studios, where Sesame Street is filmed," at which point a picture of the cast is shown. Stephen continues, "Due to rising property values, Oscar the Grouch now sublets his garbage can for $4,000 a month" (accompanied by a picture of a couple living in the can).
September 2, 2008 In reference to Colbert's months-long challenge to his viewers to make John McCain interesting by manipulating his image against a green background, the show's teaser provides a title screen that reads "It's Not Easy Being Greenscreened."
September 25, 2008 In response to claims made by both John McCain and Barack Obama that they represent the "party of Roosevelt" (Franklin Delano Roosevelt was a Democrat, Theodore Roosevelt a Republican), Colbert sets out to decide which was the greatest Roosevelt. After examining each man's credentials and coming up with a tie, Colbert declares his own personal favorite the winner: Roosevelt Franklin, who he describes as "Sesame Street’s borderline racist Muppet from the 1970s." As an example of his oratorical skills, a clip is played of Roosevelt Franklin leading his class in a recitation about loud and soft. Colbert submits that the character "is the Roosevelt for our times: for he represents blue states and red states, in that he's purple."
October 16, 2008 Marking the show's third anniversary, Colbert lists meeting Cookie Monster among his greatest achievements of the past year. In archival footage taken at the Smithsonian Institution from his original coverage in January, Colbert attempts to get Brent Glass to add a portait of Colbert to the Smithsonian's collection. In footage not shown in the previous segment, standing in front of a Kermit the Frog puppet in the Smithsonian's collection, Colbert asks, "My portrait has been on television, and so has Kermit. So do you begin to see the value of having my portrait in here?"
October 22, 2008 Commenting on John McCain and Sarah Palin's personification of the middle class as personalities with children's character-like names such as "Joe the Plumber," Colbert quips, "These are the people in your neighborhood. They're the people that you meet when you're walking down the street. They're the people that you meet each day."
October 30, 2008 Deciphering his own word association code to determine the outcome of the upcoming presidential election, an image of Guy Smiley is used to connect "white guy" and "smiley face."
November 3, 2008 In a list of Winners and Losers throughout the 2008 presidential campaign, Colbert declares Numbers as a big winner, citing that they've been used everywhere in the media. A montage of clips follow in which candidates and news reporters use numbers to back up their facts. The last three clips are from Sesame Street, ending with the Count at the beginning of Episode 0666. A still shot of the Two-Headed Monster follows as Colbert states, "Clearly Sesame Street had the most balanced of election coverage. Their lead anchor really gave equal time to left and right."
January 15, 2009 In a retrospective of George W. Bush's relationship with the press, after commenting on the revelation that reporter Jeff Gannon was both a planted reporter and a former gay escort, Colbert comments, "Unfortunately, some people in the Press Corps weren't puppets, they just looked like them- like Helen Thomas, long-time lover of both Statler and Waldorf. One of the freakiest three-ways imaginable."
February 4, 2009 During the segment "Who's Not Honoring Me Now", Colbert complains about the second place winner of the Bocuse d'Or cooking competition, Jonas Lundgren of Sweden. Colbert then shows a clip of Lundgren, which is footage of the Swedish Chef singing his theme on The Muppet Show. "I don't even think that's Swedish," remarks Colbert.
February 12, 2009 Playing word association to predict the winners of the Oscars, Colbert uses Oscar the Grouch to connect Oscar Wilde with trash cans.
February 23, 2009 Oscar is again referenced in the teaser for Colbert's Academy Awards coverage.
April 28, 2009 In the segment "Who's Not Honoring Me Now?," Stephen chastizes the Pulitzer Prize Commitee who awarded Steve Reich for his 2007 composition "Double Sextet." After listening to a sample, Colbert says, "That is what I call head-banger music; in that it was clearly written by someone banging their head against a piano. I believe we have footage of Mr. Reich composing." A clip follows of Don Music exclaiming "I'll never get it!" as Reich's piece substitutes the sound effects from Music's head striking the keyboard.
May 5, 2009 When describing Ronald Reagan's nominee Robert Bork for Supreme Court Justice in 1987, Colbert calls the vetting process history's gold standard. It included "a fiery speech by Ted Kennedy, an anti-Bork commercial narrated by Gregory Peck, and this scathing editorial..." A clip of The Swedish Chef on The Muppet Show follows with captions for Chef's dialogue as he sings his theme. "A far-right originalist has been nominated for the Supreme Court. He must be stopped. His name is Bork! Bork! Bork!" Colbert remarks, "Poor guy never knew what Borked him."
May 20, 2009 Promoting, Colbert goes through a list of schools around the country who need various types of school supplies. Mrs. G in Texas is asking for an "Elmo Visual Presenter" to enhance their multimedia learning. Colbert: "Now, for your information, the Elmo Company has nothing to do with Elmo from Sesame Street. And just so there's no more confusion, I suggest they change their name to the Multimedia United Projection Plan for Education and Teachers, or M.U.P.P.E.T. Should clear things right up."

Earlier in the show, Colbert remarks "House Speaker Nancy Pelosi is up to her Elmo-sized eyeballs in media guano over what she did or did not know about waterboarding."

June 1, 2009 The return of Guy Smiley as Mitt Romney is used in a piece about Chief Justice nominee Sonia Sotomayor. "You don't think his judgement and empathy were forged by long, hard days working at his family's mayonnaise farm?"
June 29, 2009 Discussing the census, Colbert states that we have to attack counting. "Counting uses Arabic numerals, and it is a known associate of vampires." A picture of Count von Count accompanies the statement.
July 1, 2009 Introducing Nick Kristof: "My guest tonight is a New York Times columnist who recently wrote about pollution causing genital mutations in frogs. Kermit's right, it's not easy being green."
July 27, 2009 Teasing the appearance later in the program of Swedish swing/rap band Movitz!, the screen's caption reads "Swedish Def."
August 5, 2009 An image of Guy Smiley is again used to illustrate Mitt Romney in a story suggesting that the former Massachusetts governor is still raising money for his Presidential campaign.
October 6, 2009 Covering a story about sperm banks that offer celebrity look-alikes, (including one option advertised as looking like Bill Gates, Bob Saget and Stephen Colbert), Colbert debuts his new line of Formula 401: A Star Is Born. It's his own man seed produced while he was doing impressions of celebrities. Amongst the list is Kermit the Frog.
October 8, 2009 Colbert: "Now, it's perfectly fair to attack Glenn [Beck] for what he believes, after all he's a public figure. Just like President Obama or Kermit the Frog." Four clips of Beck making a funny voice follow. "He's a fear-monger of a thousand voices. Well, two."
October 26, 2009 During an interview with Cornel West, Colbert responds to his eccentric conversational tone, "Why do I feel when you talk to me that I'm a puppet on Sesame Street? You're talking to me like I'm Elmo."
November 9, 2009 During the show's teaser: "Happy 40th Birthday, Sesame Street. That bird's not getting any bigger, I say we eat him now."
November 11, 2009 Colbert comments on the 40th anniversary of Sesame Street, which he refers to as "the most insidious socialist brainwashing program in our nation’s history" and weighs in on the recent "POX News" joke controversy: "Personally, I wish my cable company carried POX News. They provide insightful coverage at my reading level...I would much rather my children watch opinionchicken Glenn Beak squawk about how President Barack Opossum wants to euthanize Big Bird and legalize Bert/Ernie marriage." Other clips in the five and a half minute segment include "Henson #3", Cookie Monster's appearance on The Colbert Report, Kermit and Joey, Cookie Monster's egg sandwich, Grover and Jesse on marriage, the Martians discover a book, Michelle Obama in Episode 4187, and the Boston Tea Party.
December 1, 2009 Responding to false congressional districts on, Colbert launches a spin-off of a regular segment, Better Know a Made-Up District. Featured is Connecticut's fictional 42nd district which is home to the city of Atlantis. Its mayor is Mr. Snuffleupagus who is having an affair with the Chupacabra.
December 2, 2009 Colbert suggests that certain drugs are being kept on the market because garbage has healing properties. "Why do you think Oscar the Grouch hasn't aged a day?" He uses that reasoning to launch a new product from Prescott Pharmaceuticals: Vaxa-Filth.
December 7, 2009 Colbert once again comments on and its made-up districts, responding to Obama's recovery head, G. Edward DeSeve, whose last name Colbert joked about by pronouncing as "decieve," to which DeSeve responded by calling Colbert "Stefan Colburt." Colbert responds that he will settle his dispute with DeSeve in the imaginary 65th district of Rhode Island "on the corner of Sesame Street and Electric Avenue at 13 o'clock February 30th."


Colbert's guest roster has included a range of people from the worlds of politics, entertainment, business, and elsewhere (including Wikia founder Jimmy Wales). Many of these guests have also worked with the Muppets on various occasions.

External links

  • Official site
  • Colbert Nation
  • Wikiality: The Truthiness Encyclopedia


Wikipedia has an article related to:

This article uses material from the "The Colbert Report" article on the Muppet wiki at Wikia and is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike License.


Up to date as of February 04, 2010

From Wookieepedia, the Star Wars wiki.


This article is about a fan activity topic.

Events, opinions, and individuals described in this article are neither present in any authorized source nor claimed to occur in the Star Wars universe.

The Colbert Report

Stephen Colbert


October 17, 2005


22 minutes



The Colbert Report is an American satirical television program that spoofs news talk shows. Its host is comedian, actor and writer Stephen Colbert. The show's major contribution to Star Wars fandom was the "Green Screen Challenge," in which fans were encouraged to create humorous, Star Wars-themed clips using footage of Colbert in front of a green screen. Many fans sent in contributions, which were featured on the show and its official website, A "winner" of the contest was announced on the October 11, 2006 episode. Among the runners up was "George L." from Marin County, California, who turned out to be none other than George Lucas, presenting an entry made by Industrial Light & Magic.

The Green Screen Challenge

The "Challenge" began in earnest when Colbert profiled California's 6th congressional district, which contains the Skywalker Ranch, on his August 10, 2006 show. In the segment he mentioned Skywalker Ranch and George Lucas, and briefly pretended to fight enemies with a lightsaber in front of a green screen. After this, fans across the internet began creating their own special effects for the greenscreen scene, and a few days later, Colbert revealed some of their efforts on The Colbert Report and announced an official "challenge."

Notable clips include one of Colbert battling a monster with the heads of Hillary Clinton, Ted Kennedy, and Howard Dean, and of the host defending U.S. president George W. Bush from attackers. On the October 11 episode Colbert announced the "winner" to the challenge would be selected from the top two contestants. The first clip, sent in by "Bonnie R." from Torrance, California, featured Colbert involved in a patriotic game. The creator of the second clip, "George L.", made an appearance on the show. His entry, made by ILM, featured Colbert professionally edited into a scene from Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith and talking to Jar Jar Binks, voiced by Ahmed Best, who played the character in the films. In the end, Colbert announced Lucas' effort was only good enough for second place, and presented the director with a consolation prize of a free Colbert Report mug and T-shirt. The episode ended with Lucas and Colbert engaging in a lightsaber fight that finished with Lucas vanquishing Colbert.

Other references to Star Wars

Other references to Star Wars on the Colbert Report include:

  • The first episode of The Colbert Report took place on the day Peter Mayhew, who portrayed Chewbacca in the films, received his American citizenship. At the end of the episode, Stephen Colbert brought this point up, stating that the day was a type of new beginning for Peter Mayhew, in that he received his U.S. citizenship, just as it was a type of new beginning for the show, "in that it is, in fact, the actual beginning of the show." He then stated it was the sworn duty of the United States to claim as many Star Wars actors as possible ("except for Alec Guinness, who died before we could get to him") and ended the show with, "goodbye, or as Chewbacca would say it, 'raaaaaaaargh!'"
  • On the January 31, 2006 episode of, Colbert admonished eBay sellers, pointing out an autographed picture of "Stephen Colbert" he purchased off the site—which, in reality, was a picture of Lando Calrissian, although he added "strangely enough, that's my actual signature."
  • On the March 2, 2006 episode, Colbert mentioned Star Wars during his "The DaColbert Code" segments, which he repeated on a later episode.
  • On the 29 March 2006 episode, Colbert mentioned in the intro, "Brute Bartlett says that George Bush is ruining Ronald Reagan's legacy. He must not mean Star Wars, since George Lucas already ruined that."
  • On the April 3, 2006 episode, Stephen said that "clones make a lot of people nervous," to which "The Word" added, "Yoda, for one."
  • On the April 20, 2006 episode, when guest Ralph Nader said that corporations holding the rights of people was like robots holding the rights of people, Colbert responded by saying, "What do you have against droids? Star Wars, the whole saga was about the droids, droid oppression."
  • On the May 17, 2006 show, when talking about the "betrayal" of his "black friend," Alan, Colbert said, "I always knew Alan was as dashing as Billy Dee Williams. But I never figured he'd be my Lando Calrissian."
  • The September 12, 2006 show featured Stephen Colbert using a lightsaber to open a door for President Bush, when Bush was trying to open a locked door in China.
  • On the November 2, 2006 show, Colbert interviews Ron Reagan, a proponent of stem cell research. According to Colbert, "His dad had Star Wars; he's got Attack of the Clones."
  • The spoof-cartoon Stephen Colbert Presents Stephen Colbert's The New Tek Jansen Adventures spoofs Star Wars in several ways, including the opening scrawl, its incorrect use of "parsec" and scenes mirroring the Millennium Falcon docking at the Death Star.
  • On the 11 January 2007 show, Colbert relates the effects of Apple's new iPhone to Princess Leia's metal bikini.
  • On the January 29, 2007 edition of The Colbert Report, Colbert kept referring to guest Barry Lando as Lando Calrissian.
  • On the April 9 2007 show, Colbert warns against the future threat of "an army of super-gay clones," stating that he mistakenly rented "Sperm Wars II: Attack of the Bones," which had a better Anakin actor than Hayden Christensen.
  • During the April 19, 2007 show, Colbert said "Metaphor be with you" in a reference to "May the Force be with you" for the show's Metaphor-Off.
  • On the June 28 2007 show, Colbert states that because Unity08 is having its convention online, only "computer nerds" will attend. Hence, the chosen candidates will be Doctor Who and Chewbacca.
  • On the October 3, 2007 show, Colbert wonders if Matthew Reinhart will have the "balls" to stick to an October 9 release date for Star Wars: A Pop-Up Guide to the Galaxy or if he would "crumble like a B1 battle droid." Colbert's I Am America (And So Can You!) was released on the same day.
  • On the January 21, 2009 show, Colbert began to look forward to the 2012 elections, using a logo in the Star Wars font, and a clip that edited President Obama to look like Jabba the Hutt, Nancy Pelosi as Salacious Crumb, and Harry Reid as Princess Leia in her bikini.
  • On the April 27, 2009 show, Colbert "ate" the Ewok Wicket (a large teddy bear with an apple stuffed in its mouth).
  • One of the scenes from the intro to his segment Stephen Colbert's Skate Expectations: Kicking Ice and Taking Donations on the Slippery Slope Down the Icy Path to the Frozen Road Up to Vancouver '010 shows Colbert riding across the screen on a tauntaun.

External links

This article uses material from the "The Colbert Report" article on the Starwars wiki at Wikia and is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike License.

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